Badgirlbigtits - What's Mine, Is not Always YOURS

💗Badgirlbigtits☝ 

Hello, hello. Just in case you didn't, you should've read that "Hello, Hello" with the voice from that one phone-guy from the FNAF series. Yes, I'm into FNAF. Still. Yes. I'm a manchild. In the case you don't know what "FNAF" is, it stands for Five Nights at Freddy's. I could explain to you who Freddy is, and how you can spend SEVERAL HOURS of MatPat videos trying to understand the story behind the franchise, but let's not do that today. Also, don't ask me who MatPat is, let's just hope you'll find out soon enough through Jeopardy on TV. What this whole FNAF-Talk sums up to is: You should not make me feel bad because of my taste in videogames. Not just that, it's taste in general. Don't judge taste.

"That's so hypocritical", you say. I'm literally judging vaginas without consideration for my reader's taste in vaginas. Speaking of course about theoretical taste, as, most vaginas do taste the same. And yes, I just used vagina four times in a paragraph, which is very redundant, and in return, lets you infer my bad taste in wording. If you're asking why I'm beating arround the bush (We all know it's nicer to beat while looking at one), it's the fact that this is the first time I've judged a profile I would usually have no real interest in. Mainly, because of my own taste in vaginas (five times).

As you can probably infer from this picture, the name "Bad-Girl-Big-Tits" (Here, split up into its components) is very good at compiling the content of this subscription with extreme simplicity. Tits. Big tits. Big tits that belong to a bad girl. So yeah, boobs. I like boobs, no, I love boobs. You probably love boobs too. And don't we all? Why, then, would I have no interest at all in this profile?

To put it in complex words: "The fact 99% of the pictures and videos in her gallery are simple boob-shots, combined with the absence of a face to this woman, that I'm trying to use as a catalyst for my ejaculation, creates a vast but empty hole in the Onlyfans Experience, that I am unable to ignore. As such, I would ordinarely not consider to purchase a subscription from "badgirlbigtits"."

To put it in simple words: "I'm more of an ass guy"

This doesn't mean I would ever subscribe to a profile, that only provides ass pics though. In general, boob photos are better than ass photos, even better than both of them are pussy-pics. EVEN BETTER THAN ALL THREE OF THOSE: "The Magnum-Opus". Meaning: Combining all three. 

If you are one of those weird humans that prefer "personality", though, you'll try to bullshit me into believing there's nothing better than a picture of her eyes.

Even so, in any of those cases, (Yes, even the idiotic one eith the eyes), you'll find yourself lacking a certain "fullfilment" with "badgirlbigtits'" profile. This is, in my professional eyes (In my field of writing this means I've consumed more porn than actual television with set eyes (No, I won't provide a picture of my eyes to the previously mentioned weirdos)), due to a list of THREE problems I can lay out for you in the following list:

A - Lack of Iconography

B - Lack of Identity

C - Lack of Presentation

A - Iconography is a term that refers to the use of "Icons" in film. An Icon is a visual element that conveys a certain meaning, attribute or context. Applied to people, here a "public figure" (Yes, even though she shows her "private" parts), it would refer to the sort of "atmosphere" they convey with how we see them. And there lies the problem. We do see her boobs, but we don't really see her face. And it's not even about wanting to see her face covered in cum, no. Not this time. It's just the main concern, of not being able to really build interest for a person you haven't seen.

B - That leads us to the lack of Identity brought along by her. If we can't get attached to any mental image of her, just of her boobs, there's really no point in being a "fan", right? This can also be seen in her name: "BadGirlBigTits". While it's definetely a name nobody else picked to use, it's certainly unique for that same reason. Nobody else wanted that name. If you look at the four components of that name, what does it really tell you about HER specifically? Yes, she has big tits, and she's a bad girl. But doesn't that apply to most pornstars nowadays? Like, even just looking at Onlyfans, that's basically the rule. Maybe not size-wise, but, tits nonetheless. Point being, there's nothing in her established identity to set her appart from anybody else. And if she could be ANYONE, why care? In the Introduction to this blog you'll find a short segment on the "Fan-To-Girl" dinamic of Onlyfans, and how crucial it is. With no identity though, you check out the posibilty of anyone becoming a fan of you. And if you do that on "ONLYFANS", you'll find yourself struggling even more than others.

C - Some of you will tell me, that there IS some kind of identity to her, besides "BADGIRLBIGTITS", due to the name "Jenni" being in her profile. Now, even though this name is clearly there, FACTUALLY SO, it's still hidden, in some ways. Which brings me to the whole "presentation" thing, that sums up these three factors naturally. In many ways, choosing to put the "Jenni" into your BIO, and not your profile-name, is suicide. Even changing her name to BadJenniBigTits would make the difference, it would make clear that we're here for Jenni's tits, not for the tits alone. And the fact she's missed that chance, tells you everything you need to know about the way she presents her profile. Much like her tits, the presentation we see, is sloppy. Now, for breasts, being sloppy is good, for presentation, not so much. The factor I'm missing here is a certain "professional flare". While many other accounts on Onlyfans do contain highly curated sets of pictures and videos, this one doesn't. She's much more casual than other girls, which, yes, is a cliché, mainly BECAUSE she's not like other girls.

D - The one in my pants.

DD - (BONUS) Them titties of hers.

So, she's not like OTHER girls...She's not greedy, she's not selling a character, NO. She's just herself. The sloppy presentation, tells you exactly what kind of profile this is. A casual one. Now, due to my busy schedule, I couldn't spend my days EXTENSIVELY sexting with her. I did "some" chatting, and, it was good (It was fine). Was it the most exciting sexting experience I've ever had? No. Was it good? A little. Was it enough? Probably. All I'm saying is, this girl is nice, and she'll try her best to satisfy you. This is the part where that "otherness" starts to be a little obstacle (to me, at least). While I can appreciate what she's doing, I must admit, it doesnt really appeal to most of my likings. The fact that she's not part of the mass, just means she's a "very unique" individual.

What I'm trying to get to, is the reality of her "specialty". Because, in a lot of ways, her uniqueness is but a limiter. She's a milf, she shows no face, she has a very personal, yet casual style to her pictures, she's extremly natural with her looks. Those are just SOME of her qualities, admittedly, the most surface ones. And they limit her, in a sense, that you have to REALLY be into all of those qualities if you mean to like the package-deal. Personally, I don't really have a MILF-fetish (yet), I don't think boobs are great enough to be served as an individual dish, I don't have a thing for faceless women (yet), AND, unfortunately, I do have some rather high beauty standards. This is just to say, that, at least for me, the pictures you get from Jenni's profile, aren't appealing enough. I do like natural beauty, to some extend, but the way in which she's presenting her body here isn't enough to capture my attention. And with no attention, comes no erection. ALSO, just no "coming" that could "come" at all.

Talking about the pictures, and other things you get within the subscription; At the time of writing this review, for $6.69(nice) a month (+transaction fees), a sub to Jenni (BadGirlBigTits) contains:

-141 photos (99% breasts (the same ones))

-30 videos (99.9% breaSts, maybe with some dick between them)

-Active Sex-Talk (Rather fast, and frequent response; good enough)

-Daily content (99.99% tits)

-Custom Requests (Aside from her face, most things will probably pass)

So, as you can probably imagine, this is a VERY down to earth profile, by a VERY down to earth lady, targeted at the VERY down to earth people that flurish in their love for MILFs. Is it something for everyone? No, not at all. But is it bad? Maybe, for some of us. But is it still a girl with some nice boobs? Definetly (Probably). 

The fact she's more low-profile than most Onlyfans-chicks you know is a crucial contributor to her image. It allows her to be more active in her interactions, and come off as a genuine person, instead of a "greedy-girl". Even so, her attributes make her accesible ONLY to those of you who already developed a taste for women like her. If you're not into MILFS, or just more grounded, realistic, beauty, then this is NOT A PROFILE FOR YOU. In fact, if none of the pictures used in this review appealed to your libido, you should probably look somewhere else. Perhaps one of those single mothers in your area is interested in a sugar-baby. But even if they don't look like what you're looking for, it is important, again, to NOT JUDGE other's taste. If I can be into FNAF, YOU can be into your cousin. And THAT'S OKAY.

So, as you probably gathered, this wasn't really a big turn-on for me either, which will reflect in the score that's coming up, but even if my penis didn't get as much pleasure as it needed, my OTHER thinking organ surely did. My mind. As this was the first time a "Lady-Of-The-OF" (Yes, it's pronnounced "ladyoftheof" /ˈleɪdiəvðiːəv"/, and YES, "OF" stands for Onlyfans) reached out to me, to PERSONALLY review her works. For the first time in my life, a person wanted me to write about her, and that is something I'll always cherrish, both as a writer and a human. Having your first time with a MILF is "the dream", even better than going to jail for your BRO, and thanks to Jenni, I have made it come true, as "it" came too. And yes, "it" is refering to my penis.

Finally, as I'm sure she's reading this, Jenni, Jenni, I've got your number, will it be a 8, 6, 7, 5, 3 or 9?

WELL:

I grant badgirlbigtits, and her Onlyfans subscription,

a 5/10

-Johnny G. Johnson